I’m Not the Disabled You Picture..

Looking back through the decades of disabled life, it’s clear what kind of traits were grouped together.. and the words that came with them:

• Deaf, dumb, and blind
• Vegetables
• Special Needs
• Retarded
• Mentally/physically challenged

And those are just some.. but all of those labels.. show the sheer discrimination the disabled community has been forced to endure. Human beings, actual people, treated like we had no voice, no presence, no place.

Let’s be honest: when you hear the word disabled, what’s the first thing that pops into your mind?

I can guarantee it’s bed bound. Wheelchairs. Walking sticks. Needing care 24/7. Care homes. Hospitals.

Even the elderly.

What a joke, right?

Well, no… not in reality.

Because yes.. disabled people are all of the above. Some of us do need wheelchairs. Or sticks. Or full-time care. Or hospital support.

But does that make us any less of a person?

Haha… NO. No it doesn’t.

If anything, it proves how resilient, strong, and courageous we are. We’re living in a world that tries to group us by how we look.. instead of how we act, live, or behave.

For instance.. if I put on some makeup, style my hair nice, wear uncomfortable clothes and go out, people say, “Oh, you must be better.”

No. I’m just living.

But if I go out with no makeup, comfy clothes, and hair brushed back?

It’s: “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“You don’t look well.”

“You can’t do that.”

Talk about complete opposites.. purely based on how I present myself.

What the non-disabled community doesn’t realise is…

Every. Single. Day. Is. Different.

But at the same time… it’s like Groundhog Day.

We live with chronic illnesses, disorders, disabilities.. Every day. But our symptoms change.

Some days it’s manageable.

Some days it’s unbearable.

Sometimes we flare. Sometimes we crash.

Sometimes we have five different things going wrong.. and still show up with a smile because what else are we meant to do?

“If I show joy, I must be faking it.

If I dress bold, I must not be suffering.

If I speak up, I must not be struggling.”

Well guess what? I do all three. And I’m still disabled.

One thing my disabilities, chronic illnesses, and disorders can’t take from me is my love for colour.

I show it through my hair, my clothes, my makeup (when I wear it), and even my mobility aids. It’s the one part of me that gets stronger daily instead of fading.. and I proudly share it across my socials.

Because let’s face it: life would be boring as hell if it were all black and white.

Who wants to be the same?

Who wants to blend in?

Not me.

And that includes being shoved into the groups people think disabled folks belong in.

Then there’s the whole “you’re so inspirational” narrative. For just existing.

Like, hang on… what do you expect?

That we all sit around, silent and helpless, waiting for others to make sure we love while they live?

If that’s how you see us.. that’s not flattering. That’s offensive.

Everyone deserves the same chances, goals, achievements, praise, and recognition.

Disabled people included.

Yes, I have a wheelchair.. but that doesn’t mean I can’t get a job.

Yes, I need walking sticks.. but I can still go on beautiful nature walks.

Yes, I have heart issues and need to monitor it.. but that doesn’t mean I can’t laugh until I cry.

Yes, I have bowel issues.. but I can still socialise and enjoy myself.

Just because I’m disabled and you can’t see everything I deal with, doesn’t mean I’m incapable of living.

We live.

We adapt.

We change.

We grow.

Just like any other living being on this planet.

Over the years, I’ve had some right shitty comments.

Excuse my language.. but honestly, it’s the only way I can say it and have it land the way it needs to.

• “You don’t look sick.”
• “You broke your leg?”
• “Why are you in a chair?”
• “Do you have to use your sticks?”
• “Look in the mirror, say something positive, and you’ll be okay!”
• “You’re a fit and healthy young woman!”
• “You’re lazy.”
• “You’re fine.. it’s all fake.”

And would you believe it… two of those came from a medical professional.

Yup. This is the stuff the disabled community deals with.. And daily.

And here’s the funny part:

The people who say this stuff? They probably wouldn’t last an hour in our shoes.

They’d crumble.

They’d melt down.

They’d act like it was the end of the world.

But for me.. this life became a new chapter.

It wasn’t the end. It was the beginning of owning who I am.

Yes, I have my bad days. But this is me. And I’m done dimming myself just to make others comfortable.

“I’m done dimming my life to fit a room I wasn’t invited into properly in the first place.”

Some people, communities, systems.. and yeah, even those in power.. act like we’re not allowed to live boldly.
Spoiler alert:
Middle fingers up.. they’re wrong.

We’re allowed to take up space.

We’re allowed to be heard.

We’re allowed to exist without apology.

We have rights.

We have power.

We’re not going away quietly.

And when we’re excluded, ignored, or erased.. you’ll hear about it.

So do the whole disabled community a favour.. If We make you uncomfortable, ask yourself why your idea of disability only includes the quiet kind?!

You might not get a happy ending tied up with a bow…

But you will get a truth bomb.. covered in glitter.

I’m disabled. I’m alive. I’m LOUD.

And I’m not sorry.

I’m not here to please the world..

I’m here to live my life the best I can.

And that’s not just me…

That’s every disabled person out there, doing their best.. Every single day.